So said Edmund Burke:
Manners are of more import than laws. Upon them, in a great measure, the laws depend. The law touches us but here and there, and now and then. Manners are what vex or soothe, corrupt or purify, exalt or debase, barbarise or refine us, by a constant, steady, uniform, insensible operation, like that of the air we breathe in. They give their whole form and colour to our lives. According to their qualities, they aid morals, they supply them, or they totally destroy them.
Edmund Burke, Letters on a Regicide peace
In other words you can legislate all you like, but laws can never have the same socially binding effect as manners and you simply can't dictate all human behaviour without enslaving us. Think for example of our excessive health and safety regulations - where have they gotten us? Not so much healthier and safer but rather as a money-making engine for lawyers, bureaucrats and wily companies ready to offer "safety" products. Or consider our child protection laws - have they ensured that our children are protected from the snare of physical abuse and/or sexual harm? The untimely deaths of Victoria Climbie, Baby P, Khyra Ishaq tell a different story (and if you think these three cases are exceptional, talk to any social worker and they'll tell you this is just the tip of the iceberg).
All these horrors and abuses I would suggest, would be better dealt with if our society was more into their manners i.e. if we as a society had unspoken precedents, taboos, ceremonies and protocols governing everyday situations (e.g. always opening the door for the ladies, not leaving the table until everyone has finished eating, speaking to the father of the girl before asking her out and so on). Without these rituals, society often ends up either in totalitarian tyranny or anarchical chaos. Or put another way, between law on the one side and freedom on the other, there needs to be a middle territory where good manners govern. Or as someone once said, Manners trumps Law.
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